By David Ryback, Ph.D.

The courage that Jack Kennedy displayed in facing down the Cuban missile crisis, that Churchill showed in fostering Britons’ courage to show a stiff upper lip in the face of Nazi bombing, that any leader musters when he or she reaches out for the right decision and the rest of the organization subsequently breathes a sigh of relief—this collective sigh of relief is brought about by the courage to recognize the prevailing sense of what others are already thinking and feeling but are afraid to articulate.

The word “courage” has at its root the old French word “corage,” associated with the modern French word for heart—“coeur.” Courage is heartfelt.  It stems from deep within, from the real self.  True leadership is heartfelt; otherwise it is mere management.

The deepest form of leadership is the ability to stand up to the greatest of crises, reach down to one’s real self in terms of naked courage, and communicate with heartfelt eloquence a solution that others can understand instantly and (more…)

By David Ryback, Ph.D.

Laughter and smiles are often signs of relaxed comfort, quite the opposite of hierarchal power imposed on the organizational structure, where scowls are more common than smiles.  In such status-based organizations, power is assigned according to rank, and there is little wiggle room for the free expression of inner resources on the part of “lower-ranking” subordinates.  Here status reigns supreme, not open awareness.

True power can never be lost, except at the point of a gun, of course.  In a free and open culture, an effective leader who yields power with generosity and support will only become a more steadfast and credible leader, resulting in greater loyalty and commitment within the organization.  Beyond that, the Awareness Factor approach to leadership and management encourages much more creative productivity within the organization.  The Status Factor approach, ironically, results in more conflict and sense of frustration throughout the organization, since there is little opportunity to express and resolve such conflict.  So the end result is low morale and high turnover, though no one admits to exactly why.   The status quo is maintained with flagrant disregard for changing business realities.

Consultants often hop on the bandwagon of their employer’s status thinking and neglect to challenge existing ways.  They often don’t appreciate the need for the Awareness Factor in business—what is going on out there in the marketplace, for instance—before leaping into new re-engineering makeovers.  In his book, Early Warnings, Ben Gilad refers to this blind delusion as “cocoonism,” where there is little awareness of the outside factors, allowing the Status Factor to reign supreme from within.
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By David Ryback, Ph.D.

There’s a new generation in the workplace—more focused on process over endgame, on people over paycheck, on personal development over company loyalty.  The values of what we might refer to as the Status Generation have yielded to those of the Awareness Generation.  ConnectAbility fills the needs of this new workplace by providing the skills necessary to work with others—whether as peers or reports—in a manner that allows for the authentic recognition of others’ needs, both social as well as emotional.  Research—under such banners as emotional, social, moral, executive intelligence and other forms of multiple intelligences—has validated the utility of this new approach to interpersonal communication.
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By David Ryback, Ph.D.

Take some time out of your stressed-out world and meditate on what’s important to you. Take a walk alone or an easy drive on a road with no traffic and think about what’s really important to you.  What will matter to you in the long run?  What will make life worth living in terms of where you put most of your effort?  What are you good at?  How do you “follow your ecstasy”?  Once you get clear about that, your motivation will climb to unfamiliar levels.  Doing what you’re good at and what makes you feel most fulfilled is how best to get motivated for the success of which you are capable.  Michael Jordan acquired his intensity for competition by knowing what he was good at and putting in all the extra effort on the court, putting in more hours of practice than any of his teammates despite his great skill level.  Hockey great Wayne Gretzky proved his natural talents to his doubters by working that much harder at what he was already good at.  Arnold Palmer learned to attack the course rather than play it cautiously even though he was already a proven champ.

“Why do I play the game?” “Chipper” Jones of the Atlanta Braves reflected.  “I think team.  I am an extension of team.  I live to ‘carry’ the team.”   Chipper’s natural advantage was to feel part of the team more than as a sole star.  His strength came from the connection to the Braves team. That lifted his potential–the connection to his teammates.
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By David Ryback, Ph.D.

Effective meetings take a lot of preparation before the event itself.  But sometimes, such preparation isn’t possible because the participants aren’t available prior to the event itself, not offering the opportunity of prior discussions and processing.  Then all, or most of, the work must be done at the meeting itself.  That might occur, for example, at board meetings, the members of which are quite busy and who have not yet developed close enough relationships with the other member to allow for prior processing.

What works best, when I’m responsible for such meetings, is to listen carefully enough to differing viewpoints so that I can then summarize the essence of each point of view to the speaker’s satisfaction.  Then, at the point of closure, I do my best to authentically integrate what I’ve heard so that no speaker of any viewpoint feels dismissed.  Finally, I articulate the conclusion that is true to the group’s initial intent, but now integrating the meaty and substantial portions of what has been shared.

When garnering support from your base, project your listening skills by demonstrating that you’re not only listening but, more important, hearing what others are saying.  Acquire the skill of summarizing the substance of each person’s contribution at the end of each meeting, before adding your own vision, integrating it into the context of what you’ve heard.  This skill component involves combining the hearing and presenting in such a manner that all in the present group feel heard, appreciated and then inspired by the new vision of which they can now feel a part.

By David Ryback, Ph.D.

Preparation for an important meeting can be very strategic.  It means the difference between success and failure in terms of whether or not you make that meeting successful in terms of getting what you want done through the agreement of the participants.

If possible, discuss your new vision, prior to the meeting, with your close associates to create a base of support for the success of this vision when final decisions are made.  The more radical your vision is, the more it differs from the status quo, the greater the need for agreement from your base of support.  As Jack Welch puts it, “change happens faster and deeper in organizations when people are emotionally engaged.”

It’s my strong belief that the most successful meetings—that involve change or new visions—are merely the desert of the meal.  The main course takes place prior, getting others’ feedback and negotiating the final outcome.  Appetizers are the feelers put out to see who might be in agreement and who not.  The main course is the hard work of authentically sharing, listening and compromising.   The desert—the formal meeting itself—is the culmination of the work leading to the agreement.