By Rick Forbus, Ph.D.
Before I go any farther with this article I want to make it clear that I know this is an unusual topic for general business leaders. Forgiveness is never easy whether in organizational life, family life or just generally in relationships. It is, however, a relevant topic when it comes to leadership. To forgive someone is a powerful and complex action. It can mean to absolve or clear another of their wrongdoing towards you or others. It may include the next step of freeing that person or persons from the repercussions of their incorrect actions. When we make an emotional decision to exonerate another or to be exonerated by another for our actions, something deeply emotional transpires.
Leadership has never and will never take place in a vacuum. To be a leader one has to involve others. It is the “involving of others” that brings about the relational challenges. Most leaders, from my experience as a coach, consider walking into another’s office and asking for their forgiveness a glaring weakness. Leaders also often find it awkward to respond when someone forgives them for a wrongdoing. Even though it is difficult to talk about forgiving someone in the corporate setting, what may appear to be a weakness, could be a definable strength as a leader.
Forgive and forget. Easier said than done, right? Well, now studies are showing forgiveness is not only good religion but good medicine as well. According to the latest medical and psychological research, forgiving is good for our souls-and our bodies. People who forgive: (1) benefit from better immune functioning and lower blood pressure (2) have better mental health than people who do not forgive (3) feel better physically (4) have lower amounts of anger and fewer symptoms of anxiety and depression, and (4) maintain more satisfying and long-lasting relationships. “When we allow ourselves to feel like victims or sit around dreaming up how to retaliate against people who have hurt us, these thought patterns take a toll on our minds and bodies,’ says Michael McCullough, director of research for the National Institute for Healthcare Research and a co-author of To Forgive is Human: How to Put Your Past in the Past (IVP, 1997). (more…)
